


bard in distress

by mickyy



Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: BAMF Jaskier | Dandelion, Feral Jaskier | Dandelion, Gen, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia is a softy, Implied/Referenced Torture, Jaskier fucking loves his lute, Jaskier | Dandelion Being a Feral Bastard, don't let Geralt fool you he has feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:42:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24801778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickyy/pseuds/mickyy
Summary: Sometimes, Jaskier felthewas the one cleaning up Geralt's messes. This is one of those times.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 2
Kudos: 66





	bard in distress

Jaskier groaned. His bones hurt. It ached like all the meat attached to every single one of his bones had been tenderized and tossed into a fire. How _hard_ do you have to hit someone to make their _bones_ hurt? Jaskier wasn’t sure, but Geralt probably knew. Perhaps the man who hit him knew. 

“If I have to ask again, your lute-playin’ fingers’ll be chopped off, bard,” he snarled. “Now, who’s the man that stole my horse?” The man asked harshly. If only Geralt were here, he could tell the story of how soft-hearted and compassionate he is; one look at a poorly-treated horse and the Witcher turned into a petty thief. Jaskier muttered something incoherently. “Hmmm?” He yanked Jaskier’s head up and held it closer to his ear. _Perfect_. 

Jaskier screeched, “Your mum!” as loudly and shrilly as he could. The man winced and dropped in surprise. Jaskier grabbed the large sack the man had sitting in the corner. It jangled loudly as the bard heaved it over his head and brought it forth in an arc, right into the man’s head as he tried to get up. He cried out and fell over again. “You,” _whack_ , “shouldn’t,” _whack_ , “have,” _whack_ , “fucked,” _whack_ , “with,” _whack_ , “me!” Jaskier cried. _Really_ , threatening to tear his fingers off so he couldn’t play his lute anymore was _inhumane_ ; he truly deserved getting beat with this sack full of—of what? Jaskier took a moment to check—coin, daggers, and horseshoes. _Truly_ deserved it. 

Now to find his lute, and it had _better_ fucking be in one piece.

**Author's Note:**

> just a short blurb i wrote at 2am :)
> 
> thinking of making more. comment if you'd like that ??


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